Category Archives: Marriage & Family

To defend DOMA or not to defend DOMA

by Amy Lewis

This morning the Department of Justice finds itself in a rather embarrassing dilemma.  One month ago, the DOJ filed a brief in federal court defending the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA–the federal statute protecting the definition of marriage on the federal level) against a legal challenge from a homosexual couple demanding federal benefits.  Click here for more on that lawsuit (2nd story down).

After receiving a considerable amount of heat from enraged homosexual activists for defending the constitutionality of DOMA in court (it is the DOJ’s job to defend federal law), the White House capitulated today by filing court papers claiming that DOMA is, in fact, discriminatory and should be repealed.

During his campaign, Obama promised to support a complete repeal of DOMA, so this move comes as no real surprise.  For the moment, Obama hopes to placate homosexual activists with his legal challenge to DOMA, but that’s not the only challenge DOMA faces right now. We know the Human Rights Campaign is currently lobbying Feingold to take the lead on the legislative front to overturn DOMA.

As it stands right now, however, the Obama Administration is on record as claiming DOMA is both constitutional and discriminatory.  So which one is it? As Tevya sagaciously pointed out in Fiddler on the Roof, they (or in this case–two sides of the same DOJ) “cannot both be right.”

Being a Dad Is Something Special!

by julaineappling

Wisconsin Family Council is all about families–and we believe dads are super important!  Social science research continues to support what we have long known (like since the beginning of Creation!) by experience–that kids need their dads. 

It’s been said before, but bears repeating:  there’s a big difference between “fathering” a child (as in, contributing DNA) and being a dad.  Dads are “there” for their children, providing strength, security, safety, boundaries, unconditional love, discipline, training and more.  One of the most important aspects of being a dad is modeling how to be a good dad and, very important, a good husband.  We believe the best modeling comes from Christian dads who love the Lord and seek to follow His principles and precepts.

When fathers aren’t around, bad things happen.  Research shows, for instance, that when fathers are absent, kids are more likely to have problems in school and girls are more likely to be promiscuous at young ages.

Someone has said the most important thing a dad can do for his children is to love their mother.  Boy, how true that is!  When children see a mom and dad who are in love with each other, who stay married in spite of hardships, who are united in their concern and care for their sons and daughters, who worship and pray together,  their security increases and the likelihood of their being good dads and moms is significantly strengthened.   Talk about a great investment!

So from all of us at Wisconsin Family Council to all you dads–thank you for the effort you put into your families!  You deserve honor and respect every day–but we take this opportunity to say it–and show it–in a special way.  Thank you and HAPPY FATHER’S DAY!  

P.S. Several of us at WFC have lost our dads already.  We miss them dearly and are grateful God gave us the dads He did!

For the health and success of America’s youth

by Amy Lewis

Here’s this week’s radio commentary. Read the full transcript here. Listen to the MP3 here.

What do abstinence education and poverty reduction have in common? More than you might think! Last week we learned that President Obama’s budget cut funding for so-called “abstinence-only” education and directs the funds, about $164 million, to a “Teen Pregnancy Prevention Initiative.” Is this the death-knell for abstinence education?

Not by a long shot, according to Wisconsin Abstinence Coalition Executive Director, Sally Ladke. According to the president’s current proposal, the funding would be directed to evidence-based, scientifically accurate sexual education.

We know, based on the wording of the requirements and the advocacy of some of today’s leading sexual education curriculum providers (such as Planned Parenthood), this proposal is supposed to edge out abstinence education funding. However, abstinence education actually meets those requirements.

As Ladke points out, the sexual education crowd coined the term “abstinence-only” education to discredit the abstinence movement. This is not the “just say no” approach; it’s an effective, evidence-based, scientifically accurate, age-appropriate, risk-avoidance program. It’s the abstinence-centered program.

Abstinence-centered curricula do not ignore the temptations, expectations, risks and facts of teen sexuality—they incorporate those facts into comprehensive programs centered on abstinence education. Abstinence-centered programs give kids a road map for their future, help them set goals and identify and learn the skills they need to get there without sacrificing their happiness and health.

Read the rest here.

Marriage and Family Turned on Its Head

by julaineappling

Friday it was an Iowa court; today it is a state legislature turning marriage and family on its head.

Don’t tell me evil wasn’t emboldened on November 7, 2008!  I’ve heard it everywhere as the answer for what’s happening in our country:  “We won.  That’s what happened. We won, and you lost.”

On what was really a stunning veto override vote, the Vermont state legislature today summarily changed the meaning of marriage in Vermont to include two persons of the same sex.

It’s important to note what this vote really says.  It says that domestic partnerships or civil unions (call them whatever you want) that look just like marriage aren’t enough for those who are determined to redefine and undermine marriage.

In 2000, the Vermont legislature granted same-sex couples civil unions that are exactly, and I do mean exactly, like marriage.  But that wasn’t good enough.  They wanted the word marriage.  And today they got it, proving once again that liberals beat conservatives all to pieces on persistence and tenacity.

Do not miss the significance of the Iowa and Vermont decisions, that now place these states alongside Massachusetts and Connecticut.  In addition to marriage being redefined, so is family.  Nevermind that thousands of social science research studies show that what is best for children is living with their married mother and father–that is, male and female.  (By the way, the Iowa court essentially said such research is bunk.)

The courts and legislature that have redefined family have basically said that two moms or two dads are as good as the team of one mom and one dad.  So what that really means is either men or women, depending on the arrangement, are absolutely unnecessary and immaterial in the development of young boys and girls.  That’s family redefined, remade, and, yes, turned on its head.

Again, I stand amazed that Wisconsin’s marriage protection amendment is in place!  However, I don’t rest comfortably.  It’s already been challenged in the court.  A decision affirming its legality was appealed.  I’m quite certain the case will land in the state supreme court before we’re done.

And then there’s the governor’s same-sex, marriage-like statewide domestic partnership registry and benefits in his proposed budget.  That provision also challenges Wisconsin’s amendment.

The truth?  Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom–and apparently of protecting and preserving marriage and family!  Wake up, Wisconsin!  Now is not the time to rest or hide; now is the time to show up, stand up and speak up for marriage and family!

Family (Re)Connections

by julaineappling

Bad news seems to be everywhere these days. Today I could blog on at least a dozen rather scary events, issues or ideas swirling around us right now at both the state and federal levels–from out-of-control spending at virtually every level of government to late second tri-mester abortions at the UW-affiliated Madison Surgery Center and lots of critical issues in between.  But, today I’m going to ignore those “uglies” and go a different direction.

Last weekend I went with two friends who are like sisters to me on what we fondly called our “Nice Nieces” trip. We headed Friday to Indianapolis to visit Aunt Mary, who is 88, widowed, but still living at home and enjoys being quite active. Early Sunday morning we headed to just south of Flint, Michigan, to see Aunt Ruth, 85, whose husband died less than a year ago and who now lives in a home for folks with dementia. Aunt Ruth still recognizes me and knows that she is not in her own home.

While seeing these dear aunts was our only objective, we also connected with a cousin and my brother and sister-in law.

We were in the car with just the three of us a lot those 4 days–and we didn’t spend a great deal of time at anyone place. But the time we spent with these dear aunts and with other family members was precious to all of us.

These are people who have invested in us over the years in hundreds of ways, ways that often required sacrifices of time, money, schedules, and energy. The little bit we gave to spend a little time with them last weekend pales in comparison.

Reconnecting with family, especially our aging family members, is critical. It strengthens the ties that bind, gives more wonderful memories, allows the older generation another opportunity to relate stories that shed light on who they are and prepares for the passing of the torch.

I’m so glad we made the “Nice Nieces” trip to see the “Great Aunts,” in spite of how many issues there were (and still are!) demanding my attention and time. When it’s all said and done, no issue is more important than family and connecting or re-connecting with them!

Northwest Milwaukee Community Marriage Agreement Launched

by etskelton

Today is an exciting day!  Wisconsin Family Council and ThinkMarriage are hosting the first of several “Core Committee” meetings for the Northwest Milwaukee Community Marriage Agreement.  About a dozen clergy and a few other community leaders will joing together today to initiate this effort.  One of the highlights will be to hear from Mike McManus of Marriage Savers.  He is the father of this effort.

What a blessing to be a part of this work.  Our goals are to significantly reduce divorce and cohabitation and to increase marriage rates.  Similar efforts in over 226 communities around the country have lead to 10, 20 and even 50% decreases in divorce.  The divorce ratio in Milwaukee is 10% above the national ratio, and the annual number of marriages in Milwaukee has decreased by 22% since 1995.

Yet this is great hope among the church leaders in this community.  They have embraced this effort and are expectantly looking forward to its positive impact on the community.

Marriage & Family

by etskelton

Hello.  Thanks for checking out our blog.  My name is Eric and I am the most recent member of the WFC team.   As marriage missionaries, our family has been called by God to serve communities, churches and pastors throughout the state of Wisconsin with their marriage ministries.  One of my primary responsibilities is working with the communities of Waukesha, Brookfield, Northwest Milwaukee and Racine to create Community Marriage Agreements.  I feel a lot of energy for valuing and strengthening marriage as I travel around the state.